The I’m-Wanking Job

I watched the remake of the Italian job on TV the other night, although I wish I hadnt, i must admit I enjoyed my femme compatriot Charlize Theron, who I would take down like a rabid werewolf in full moon at midnight.
There was something in this dreadful film that worried me, and no it wasnt that only 10% of the film was set in Italy (so therefore, I dont see why it could be called a remake or even have the same title they were so different) it was the absence of appropriate swearing, for instance, in the original M. Caine said that FINE stood for “Fucked-Up, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional”, in this ‘remake’ the ‘writers’ changed that algorithm to Fragile, Insecure Neurotic and Emotional.
And the second part, by probably the fattest piece of lard to ever get his fat disgusting ass on celluloid (cunningly named Skinny Pete… the hilarity) says “I know when not to mess, and I know not to mess with mother-freaking Ukranians”
Why Mother freaking? No skinny pete, no…. mother fucking, say motherfucking, its okay, you’re a big bad gangsta, you may use words like that.
My point is, we have regressed, once upon a time, our contemporaries used film to push societies boundaries, now, they just seem happy to walk on egg shells, kind of like going bowling with those bumper things pulled out either side.
TS

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You bet they pile this kind of breakable shit pile upon pile upon pile, until Hollywood has piles. Who the fuck are these looneys in executive positions handing over wads of cash to remake films, yeah, got any ideas? Nah, let’s remake that movie, what was it called? Citizen Able?
Comment by rupert — October 6, 2006 @ 6:54 pm